You Are Sixteen

16 years ago an angel was sent to me; there was no umbilical cords to cut, there was no time to prepare, I was barely 23..totally unprepared to be a mother.
I held you and looked into your eyes, that was the moment the heavens opened and the worlds best love song was played; I heard it in my heart and I know you did too. From that moment I knew you were my daughter and I was meant to be your mother..I did not know anything about long sleepless nights, changing of diapers, I knew nothing about sharing my life with a little person. While all my friends were out at the parties and bars…I was home changing diapers and singing lullabies. You saved me from all the stupid young mistakes I could have made…For this I am thankful. You spoke at 10 months and have not shut up since..you walked shortly after and every little footstep was imprinted in my heart. You dragged your little suit case around in Huge airports..LAX was almost home for everyone knew you by name as you stole peoples heart everywhere you went. I was always proud of you and you looked to me for all your questions .

Your teen years have been challenging, You started not thinking much of me..mommy became old fashioned and not too cool enough for your friends . For what do I know , when you have all the answers…I know its a phase, one that hurts every mother so so very much.
I want you to know, that I correct you because I want to teach you, I scold you so you can learn wrong from right, i ground you to keep you from making mistakes that can hurt you… Yes I have been over protective, that is just because I want you to know how much you are worth.

Today you are sixteen…and I want you to know that mommy will always wait up for you when you are out. Mommy will always be on the front row to cheer you on, I will be the shoulder you need to lean on , I will be there to whip away your tears… As you move from being a child to a young lady , I must trust in the morals I have thought you, in the guidance you have gotten from Grandma and grandpa, uncle Aaron Elijah Juan, auntie Ninfa Juan Mendoza, Auntie Marien Dela Rosa. I must trust in your judgement of friends , which you have proven to be great as you have managed to keep one best friend in over 12 years in Jasmin Ford, whom I have grown to love as a child of my own.
You will be soon having a boyfriend and I pray that God will guide you and keep you safe from harm..you will get many a broken heart, and I will be there for you when you need an embrace or a listening ear as I know Jasmin will be too.
You are so very special my love , you will be a great doctor someday soon…Do not let anything or anyone tell you different. You are a child of the living God, you are great and divine you are a miracle and I am honored he entrusted your care to me.. No matter what struggles you go through in life , no matter what mistakes you make , we will correct them and overcome them together , like I promised God it would be.

 

Happy Birthday my sweet angel

The Secrets of Change

•       Know that there is a God: His Name is Yahweh and you are his child, therefore you have his DNA of divinity and Greatness. You can make direct contact to him.
•       Change the thought you think and the words you speak. You are responsible for these!
•         Your essence is your soul, not your body, therefor; the solutions to any of your problems are inward. That is where your essence , your greatness and your divinity are!
•     Realize there are no accidents; everything & everyone has something to teach you. Appreciate and do not judge.. From some people, you learn what to do, from others what not to do. Appreciate everyone, everything and every event around you.
•       Be Peaceful, Be silent, and meditate. God’s voice is peaceful and silent!
•         Forgive yourself and make the decision to be free.  Sins are mistakes to be corrected, not punished!  Do not judge and punish yourself or others. Forgive and move on.
•     If you are seeking happiness for yourself, you will never find it. If you seek happiness for others you will find yours. You are a miracle worker       

 

• Remove all enemies from your thoughts. On a round planet, we cannot pick sides. We are all one, we are all divine! In loving others we love God, in Loving God we love ourselves!
•       Release everything you thought was impossible. Realise that you are a miracle, you are great, you are divine; for God is … So are you.
•       Grievances bring turmoil. Communication brings Peace. Unwillingness to communicate and talk things through will bring grievances and turmoil. Be open and true.
•     Do not seek to control Reality. Control yourself for you are responsible for you , not your perception of reality. Reality comes only from God!
•         Decide what is important to you; To be right or to be happy?
•        Stop seeking outside of yourself what can only be found inside of you / in your essence.
•         Depression, unhappiness, dissatisfaction and lust come from something you believe you to be deprived of. God says: “Ask and you will be given. “  What then could you be deprived of?
•         Only by making changes inside ourselves, Can we change the world around us.
• Never make a habbit of judging people; They have a way of showing you who they are…If only you give them some time and trust that the truth will show its self. Beside, if you give people enough rope..the guilty will tie it’s self up in knots before your eye.

About this Blog

A couple of years ago I was working so much I forgot about my health, family and friends. Somewhere along the road of shooting to become a successful business owner and activist for change; I lost track of what was most important. I lost track of who I am. My dreams and passions somehow turned into a reality of being stressed out, overweight and unhappy. Everything bothered me, I was on the defensive against everyone, especially those who loved me most…. I started having dreams again, like when I was a child….The more I tried to ignore them the more they haunted me! It finally hit me…

Work and Politics had become my life’s purpose. I had lost myself and I could not find me anymore. I forgot the great spiritual being I was, I forgot the Magic and walked away from the light…

Like so many other business owners, I started my business for a chance at freedom and opportunity to be the master of my own destiny. Better Education for my Children, Family vacations….I had visions of success and money, and with that I believed I could one day finally be happy. I wanted Politics so that I could help others achieve that freedom, those opportunities, the success and money that I know we can all get if only the system was different… I honestly thought that everyone wanted those same things, because to me that would be happiness…that would mean success! But the reality was I was not happy. I was miserable.

So this Blog was created to share with you my journey to find me. I will also share some other short sories of my past.

A Water Fairy

I find myself reaching out , wanting to connect with the spiritual being I know is still inside of me. I sometimes feel as if though I’m waiting in traffic to go where I don’t even want to go.

I can remember once being closely connected with that great being that I feel still lives inside of me …no matter how quiet she has become.

I was once a magical fairy and I still feel so connected to that world…in my youth it was easy to slip back and forth into the two dimensions or the two selves…

Oh, if only I can remember how I was able to transition with such joy and such easy…

So much of this material world seems fixed to make us live in a mind prison of school and work and tomorrow, with very little understanding of the happiness of simplicity of the perfect imperfections that make fairies so joyful and different.

Oh , if only we could remember these things and accept each others differences with respect and love, do you recon we could stop trying to be what we are not, and live to be what we are?

Since childhood, i have know that I was once a water fairy, a warrior, guardian of the waters…I dared not speak a word of it !

As the voice of a child has grown into that of a strong woman, I am no longer afraid …so I bring to you my story…

“A water fairy”

Chapter 1

For most of my previous life I was a mighty water fairy, the guardian of the waters.

My name is hard to translate , it means “The one who makes waves” I was often called “the wave maker”

In the spirit world fairies are earth Angels…they are the Angels that can travel to earth, they protect nature and people. We help to create beauty and happiness and peace on earth.

As guardians of the waters, water fairies are strong, love to make big waves to dance on and are a little wild.

Water fairies usually travel alone so we make the most of company when we have it. We love human children and often allow them to see us . We beacon human children to dance with us in our spring time fairy rings when we join the flower fairies in the dance of spring.

Because water fairies are human size , we fit right in on earth and very seldom are humans awaken enough to recognize us, though they often sense something special about us…they never know exactly what it is.

Fairies in general are mostly well liked by humans , though they are not sure we exist.

Water fairies , though liked…make humans uneasy ; we have an aura of strength and wisdom that make humans afraid .

I love people and the life on earth, though I miss the peace of the spirit world.

On earth I have seen some amazing places and met all kinds of fun people, yet I miss being with my own kind , and feeling apart of a large family with no need for competition of matching of wit.

Peace, love, joy, happiness and beauty are our driving force and the guiding principles for all fairies.

Because of the great gift of freedom and kindred spirit that Yahweh has given us; we love to connect with human children and many of them can see us, and we love to play with then, dance with them and teach them fun and important things about love, music, nature …and especially about magic.

This is how my life changed….I became too close to a human .

I started wondering how life would be if I became a human again…as perfect as my life was …I felt I wanted something different, I wanted to be like my human friend. Living as a human in this  century seemed like the most exciting experience in the world.

So, in the very next turning of life, I requested a re-birth as a human.

Today, I’m living a human existence and I feel I should write down my memories of the spirit world as well as all my human experiences….I want to share the deep knowledge I remember from my past lives and my experiences of both worlds.

People will find my story hard to believe because humans have strayed from the light, they have lost the magic…which is why we are sent to teach and guide them.

I have had a very , very long life on the other side , so my wisdom is well beyond my human years. I chose to keep all my memories and to stay in touch with the none physical world and so I am well versed in its ways , I can go back and forth as is needed and I request help from the other side as I find fit.

This gift of life is exciting and new, I am please with my family and all the things I’m able to do….yet humanity has much to learn and understand before the next turning of life or many will perish.

I sometimes look at pictures of my life and I smile…I look exactly the same as I have in every life I have chosen….yet ,my experiences have been so different.